Posts Tagged ‘Divorce Communication’

Often people look at divorce as a bitter, spiteful, angry battle between two uncompromising sides, but this is the extreme case. While two people may have come to realize that they no longer belong together—for whatever reason—the divorce process itself may range from amicably collaborative to viciously combative. Where your divorce falls on this spectrum depends on the answers to several questions.

How easily will you and your spouse settle on key issues like dividing assets, child custody if children are involved, and future payments?

Are you and your spouse separating on good terms or are one or both of you driven by anger, resentment, or bitterness?

Will you and your spouse be able to compromise in divorce negotiations or will one or both of you fight tooth-and-nail for what you think is rightfully yours?

Do you have full information as to your spouse’s financial situation and are you sure that your spouse is not hiding any income, assets or debts?

Do you believe that your spouse also desires to finalize a divorce in an expeditious manner or will the collaborative process be utilized as a delay tactic and pressure you to settle?

Who has selected the collaborative divorce attorney and are they likely to side with one party or the other?

Are you a good negotiator and can you avoid making impulsive, emotional decisions?

Do you understand enough about divorce to be able to compare likely outcomes of the collaborative process with the likely outcome of a contested judicial process?

The difference between a collaborative divorce and a litigated divorce is substantial. The parties in a collaborative divorce, with legal counsel on both sides, make decisions outside of the courtroom, only going to see a judge to get the details signed when the negotiations are concluded. In contrast, in a litigated divorce the courtroom is center of activity, with witnesses, challenges, and evidence presented before the judge. This also inevitably raises the cost of the divorce, both emotionally and financially. In financial terms alone, the difference between a collaborative divorce and a litigated, combative divorce can be thousands or even tens of thousands of dollars.

An experienced divorce attorney can advise as you as to whether a collaborative divorce is a good option for your particular situation. There are many times when a collaborative divorce is not a good option and a litigated divorce is your best option. In such a case, you want a lawyer with substantial court experience, who can be appropriately aggressive when needed, who knows the judges, and who can best look to your interests.

The information contained in this blog is for educational purposes only and is not legal advice. The use of this Blog does not create an attorney/client relationship between you and the Law Offices of Barry R. Lewis. If you are considering divorce or if you are involved in any legal matter, you should hire an attorney.

Massachusetts Divorce and Family Law
Attorney Barry R. Lewis — Divorce Law Specialist
Locations Throughout Eastern & Central Massachusetts :: 508-879-3262